Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Quick Check In!

Hey y'all! Good news weigh in Wednesday was a success! I'm down 14 lbs since we returned from our cruise (I'm sure the first 5 lbs of that was strictly bloat) 

So here's the breakdown :
When I returned from the cruise my band was wide open and I went on a straight liquid diet (post op diet) for 5 days and dropped 5 before my fill that Thursday. 

The Sunday after my fill, I started following the body for life nutrition and fitness guidelines and have lost 9 lbs in my first week and a half! The first week or two of any new program is always great. so now I have to keep it up! 

My parents are in town visiting and I'm so glad to have them. Tonight we had a ceviche salad, broiled grouper and a little roasted cauliflower all within our fist/palm sized portions. 

On a completely separate note, I have a really awful story to share. It's just bothering me so much that I need to vent for a second. Have you all heard about this ex-football player in Michigan that went missing this weekend and was found dead last night? I just found out today that he was married to my old roommate and very good college friend. We were really great friends for a while and spent time at each other's families houses and became roommates my sophomore or junior year. She had some personal struggles and transferred schools and we lost touch. I chose not to keep in touch because of some stuff that had happened right before the transfer. There was too much drama for me.  But she was happily married with 2 very small children and now she has lost her husband in such a tragic way. My stomach is in knots just thinking about it. If you can please send a quick prayer her way :( 

Friday, May 24, 2013

So Good

It feels so good to be healthy. How do I forget this for months at a time? 11 days of eating properly and working out and my skin is clear, I wake up without an alarm clock, and I'm more comfortable in my clothes and i just feel better about myself. Why is that so hard to remember?

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Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Tiny NSV

Today I had a tiny little non scale victory that I'd like to share. I know I've heard other people talk about the dreaded candy bowl at work. We all have them. There are 4 or 5 scattered around my office and today I really had a craving for a piece of chocolate. Normally I would have had 1 and said, " no problem 1 chocolate today, track it and be done with it." But that tends to also be a gateway for me...1 today ... another one again tomorrow.. And pretty soon I just take 3 and don't bother tracking it....and not too long after that I'd go out and buy my own bag of candy and devour the whole effing thing in a day. 

 So like I mentioned before I am really committed to start changing my life. I can't keep looking at weight loss as a short term thing. I can't keep going balls-to-the-walls perfect diet, workout overload and then burn out. It's quite obvious I've repeated that behavior more times than I can count in my life and its not working. 

So step one is having reasonable rules and discipline that i can commit to for longer than a few months. I'm doing that by following the body for life eating plan that says for 6 days a week eat 3 small meals a day and 2 snacks. Each is about 1.5 fistfuls of food from the allowed food list which includes lean protein/complex carbs/veggies. 1 day a week, though, is an off day or a cheat day. Eat whatever you want. Satisfy your cravings and recharge mentally and physically. 

So today, I craved the chocolate but thought to myself, "I can wait until Saturday." I know that NSV IS rather anti-climatic but it really is a big deal for me. 

I feel like I can really stick to a plan when a free day is always a week away. My cravings won't constantly be sitting in the back of my mind for weeks until I crack and just binge on the bad shit. 
And the whole idea is that eventually I won't even crave bad stuff or care much about a free day. But lord knows I am not there yet!! 

We did our legs and abs workout today and I'm feeling really good! Hope everyone had a fab day :) here's to tiny non scale victories adding up to large scale victories!

Monday, May 20, 2013

Today's Menu

Breakfast - Atkins Dark Chocolate Royal Shake (1/2 before my workout 1/2 after)

Lunch - small can of tuna, 1 tbsp mayo, 3 sweet gherkin baby pickles, handful of multigrain crackers

Dinner - lettuce wraps (1 handful of lean ground beef made with sunbird lettuce wrap seasoning, mixed with 1 handful of rice on 3-4 leaves of lettuce)

Snack - 1 small apple, 1/2 cup low fat cottage cheese

If you haven't tried these mixes I highly reccomend them.  They are wonderful and incredibly easy to make. Most of them call for the packet +  soy sauce + sugar (I use light soy sauce and Splenda) and some call for added veggies. 

I feel really good today. I've been eating really well for an entire week and have been working out with purpose. I'm sore and feel lighter! 

I feel like getting back on track and being good to myself helps me continue to move on from last years' woes. I'm still having a really hard time with the whole "inappropriate conversations" drama. Just horrible feelings of betrayal. Still rocks me to the core. Just have to keep moving and working through it and being good to myself.

So! All in all today was a good day.. Can't wait to start seeing results!!!

Sunday, May 19, 2013

Easy and Delicious Shrimp

Juice of 1 lime
Juice of 1 lemon
2 packets Splenda or whatever sweetener is not bad for you at the moment :) 
5 or 6 shakes of chili powder
5 or 6 drops of choula hot sauce or whatever your fav is
2 cloves of garlic
Olive oil (small amount or a misto)

This recipe was good to coat 1 lb of medium, cleaned shrimp

1. Mist a pan with olive oil and get it hot
2. Sauté the garlic for a few minutes in the pan
3. Whisk the 1st 5 ingredients in a small bowl. 
4.When the pan is hit and the garlic is done to your liking take a handful of shrimp and toss in the marinade
5. One by one place them face down in the pan and quickly toss another handful in the marinade
6. Place the second handful in the pan and then immediately start flipping the first set (shrimp cooks fast) 
7. Once all of the shrimp has been flipped once and has cooked for about 30 seconds toss all of the shrimp around in the pan so the juices coat the shrimp again. 
8. let cook for another 20-30 seconds 
9. Transfer to a dish and let cool  

(1lb of shrimp gave me 4 handful size servings. I portioned those out and will saved them for another meal) 

I wrote this last Saturday and never posted!!! Here's what we had:

I  tossed my shrimp with a handful of spinach and 3 pieces of fresh mozzarella and balsamic vinegar

MS had his with spinach 3 pieces of mozzarella and some locally made yah's salsa 

Good Morning

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. Things here are good. We got back from the best vacation we have ever taken last week and are rested and relaxed. Then my parents stopped by while passing through to my sister's which is always fun. 

I went back to see dr Yoo on Thursday. I was gearing up for a nasty conversation about what a huge failure I am. But he didn't unleash. Instead he wanted to schedule an appointment 4-6 weeks out with both me and MS for a tounge lashing. At this point it's going to be ineffective. No one in this world can be more ashamed of me than myself and sitting around reviewing just how horrible and terrible it is doesn't really help. Especially since I have really been in a good frame of mind for the past couple of months and have been working hard at changing my yo yo diet lifestyle to a more reasonable long term healthy lifestyle. It's time to move on from the whole "omg-what-have-is one-stage" to the "start- doing-something-about-it-stage."

So... That being said... Here are the good things that are happening in my life. 
1) we went on a cruise 2 weeks ago and we worked out every day on the ship
2) I was extremely conscience of what went in my mouth and how much. We ate healthy breakfasts and lunches and I stopped when I was full. We indulged sometimes but we made sure to make up for the indulgences with extra work outs. 
3) I have dropped 7 lbs and feel good
4) like I've mentioned before my life has been a series of yo yo diets swinging drastically from one end of the spectrum to the other.. I find myself always thinking about what I'll eat "after I lose this weight" so I've been reading body for life which is more of a sustainable long term program 6 days a week you eat a fistful of complex carbs and a palmful of protein. Two meals a day include a fistful of veggies as well. One day a week is an off day and you can eat whatever the hell you want. In addition to that there is a lot of weight training. Honestly its not much different than what our dietitian has laid out for us ... but the work outs are laid out and i think the cheat day will help me from swinging so far off the path. Hopefully this will help me balance out my life and be more of lifestyle change than a diet. I'm going to enter the 12 week challenge today for motivation as well. 
5) I've been having some hip pain while trying to run and I found the best chiropractor I have ever been to ... He is more of an all over health type of dr and he has given me a lot of stretching and wellness type of homework. 
6) swimming is becoming one of my favorite forms of cardio. We've been adding laps in the pool to our regular workouts
7) Here are some pictures from our trip!! 

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Home Stretch!

3 more working days until vacation!!!! Things have been good here. Have been working out really hard while working with a chiropractor on my hip. My pelvis was all out of whack and it was causing me a bunch of pain. But I'm running this 5k come hell or high water.

My band is wide open so I'm still struggling with eating too much... honestly I get hungry... But only a couple times a day... So the band is working... I just struggle because I start losing control while I'm eating. I just eat too much and i can eat too much. My best friend always calls it an out of body (all though she's skinny) it's true. I sit there and think holy shit I just ate that whole sandwich.

I'm actually really looking forward to getting this fill. I'm ready for help again I have the working out motivation again and I want to start dropping weight again. I'm going to ask for a referral to see someone about my issues with food and control. I keep saying I want to go but I think I need that extra push to actually make it happen.

My husband said our surgeon chewed him out for gaining weight, so I'm fully ready for a tounge lashing when I get there. It was funny... MS said he backed off a bit when He told him about the whole cancer ordeal but he really gave it to him.

Speaking of the cancer thing, we found out we probably aren't going to be able to have kids which is a bummer. But I'll just keep praying that whatever is supposed to happen will. I'm just glad he doesn't have to go through round after round of chemo and we could always adopt, I guess.

So I'm going to relax and enjoy my wonderful vacation and leave all the annoying life stuff aside next week. Praying for some will power before this fill and lots of rest in between some hard ass work outs!!!!

Hope everyone has a fab Wednesday!!