Ghandi's Top Ten

I just saw this on pinterest and love it

TTT

Happy Thursday! Ten Things!

1. Did everyone see the picture Reggie posted in that purple dress? Hot to death.

2. The grossest thing is happening to me right now. My hair loss has seemed to slow down, but today as I getting all the knots out of my hair I noticed red spots on my scalp. The whole top of my scalp is covered in red dry spots. SICK! AND there's gray hair everywhere. UGH! I bought some head and shoulders and I hope that takes care of this little embarrassing issue.

3. You know what's a lot more fun after you've lost a lot of weight? sex. ha!

4. Today is my second day of self inflicted liquid diet. It's been pretty good. MS got a fill today so I jumped on the bandwagon with him.

5. I am so excited for this long weekend I can't even stand it. I have been going into work early and staying late so much for the past few months that I hit a wall this week. I had a hard time focusing on anything today. I might extend this liquid diet through the weekend and I'm not talking about protein shakes.

6. So I have mentioned before that I have PCOS, and that is one of the main reasons that pushed my decision to get a band. For me, my PCOS made my period just disappear for months and then I'd get a period that lasted for months. In an effort to spare you the gory details, I'll just say that twice, it got so bad that I actually passed out because it was depleting my iron levels. So anyways I haven't had a normal cycle in almost 10 years without the help of birth control. Even though birth control is the only treatment I have been on for PCOS, I actually took it upon myself to stop taking it a few months ago because it was giving me really bad acne. So I am incredibly excited to tell you that I started my normal period today for the second month in the row!!! With NO help from pills, last month it lasted for 1 week and stopped! OMG!! YAY! I know periods are super annoying, but I'm almost* as happy to have it as I was when I was trying on clothes at Forever 21 last weekend!! IS IT POSSIBLE THAT MY OVARIES ARE WORKING?! OMG PLEASE!? That would be the best thing ever.

7. Today the little man at work that I was talking about last week wasted so much of my time. I'm going to start keeping a log of how many times he just interrupts me throughout the day and I'm going to start leaving invoices on his desk. Then I'm going to whoop his ass. I swear I would love to just wrestle that dude. Like MMA style.

8. Have I ever told you about my alter ego? You know how Beyonce has an alter ego named sasha fierce? Well mine is named Janet Jackson. She's been around since a pretty funny night in college and man she has been gettin crazy lately.

9. On that same note, I love birthdays and I really like to make a big deal about them. I do it for everyone because being an adult is super lame and I think everyone deserves a little celebration! That being said, I like to celebrate my own birthday too and this year I'm going to let Janet Jackson wear sequins, slutty makeup and big hair. Shit, I might even clip a weave in!

10. I was just thinking about how grateful I am. I feel so blessed. Moving to NC by myself 6 years ago was extremely tough. I left my amazing family and wonderful friends all behind and just kind of leaped to see what would happen. Finally, after lots of heartache, I feel complete again. Life is definitely a journey and if you just trust that God will guide you to everything you have ever asked for, he will.

Just Kidding Y'all!

Michelle's surgery is on Wed! It wasn't today! Sorry Michelle!

Filled Up

WOAH-ZER! My Band is tight! This is the first time I noticed a significant tightness early in the morning.

Also, you know how they always say eat your protein first? Well today is the first time I experienced that scenario. I went out of the office today to pick up my $1000.00 Gift Certificate for Sunglasses that a few friends and I won on Facebook (WOOHOO!) And I decided to grab a kids burrito bowl from qdoba instead of eating my normal tuna fish.

So the lady put rice in the bottom of the bowl before i could tell her to skip that part, then I just opted for the chips with the kids meal instead of turning them down like I should have.

So right before I got back to the office I popped a few chips in my mouth. Not a diet killer, but not the best decision. Well, I got to my desk took two bites of chicken and that was it for me. I was not overly stuffed , but I was full. And I knew if I took another bite bad things would follow. I didn't even get close to that rice that shouldn't be in the bowl! There goes my protein for the day! Dang it! I might need a protein shake for dinner.

Heck maybe this is what I need for a little while. Oh, or maybe I need to dial it back a bit and start eating my protein first AND eat it over a 20 minute time period like I was told!

Surgeries Tomorrow

Wanted to send prayers and good thoughts to Colleen and Michelle on thier surgeries tomorrow!!

NSV!!!

oh my goodness. I can't wipe the smile off of my face today. I really can't.

I try not to put a whole lot of emphasis on material things, but I am human. Stuff is just stuff but at the end of the day about $100 worth of stuff really made me happy today. It was kind of a pay off for every single morning I forced myself out of bed at 5:00 am to go to the gym.

For me, one of the most depressing/horrifying things about being overweight was clothing.
I have always loved fashion in fact, I was actually a professional makeup artist for seven years. Quickly after I started college I had to start shopping at plus size stores. It hurt my heart shopping with friends at stores where nothing fit me. It embarrassed me to take friends to plus size stores for a while, but even when it stopped being embarrassing, I still didn't shop with friends much. I envied my friends who raided each other's closest for clothes. I hated my wedding dress, but I settled on it because it was one of the only samples that I could actually try on. Last year It was horrifying shopping for a formal dress. It's like all plus size clothing is either a. frumpy b. floral smock-ish or c. cut to really accentuate how fat you really are. I kept saying, "Am I the only fat person in the world who needs a dress for a wedding that isn't styled for an 80 year old?"

I started wearing a size 10 shoe when I was a teenager. not a big deal, but In the past few years all that weight made my feet wider and I was confined to size 11 which has just recently become somewhat available. blahhhh. How lame.


So enough of the sob story. Today I walked into Forever 21 and went on a shopping spree. It was still plus sizes. But I didn't even care because their plus sizes are normal sizes in a women's store!!! Even though I'm on the brink of being a bit too old to be shopping at Forever 21 I tried on the absolute cutest things. I was dancing in the dressing room. I would post pics but I need to get some camis and a slip for under the dresses I bought. They are all awfully see through, but here are 2 of the items from the website. I also snagged a super cute yellow dress with a bias hem and some fluorescent pink sandals that are fab!

The one thing that really upsets me about Forever 21 is the fact that plus size there starts at size 12. It hurts my heart because I know there are a ton of teenagers who are mortified by the fact that they are shopping in a  very limited section of the store and it's labeled plus size!!!
I'm sorry but size 12 is pretty normal. In fact the skinniest I have ever been in my life was a size 14 and I was damn thin then! Oh well, off my soapbox!

After we were finished at forever 21, we went to the plus size section of Belk. Sifting through the racks and racks of floral smocks just solidified how wonderful my shopping experience was at Forever 21. I can finally dress like myself and pretty soon I'm going to really  be able to dress however the hell I want! YES!!! THANK YOU LAP BAND!!!!!

Welp, I Thought We Had This Fill Thing Under Control

So I had a new experience today. This one was extra special.

Like I mentioned yesterday my band was WIDE open again. I even ate a little bit of steak last night because it was so loose. I will say, that was a great decision on my part. yum.

This morning I wanted a mother of a fill. Everything was great, I drank a slim fast shake, took my chill pill, and drank about 90% of a bottle of water on my way to the doctor's office.

She said she gave me a .5ml fill which is what I've been averaging every 3-4 weeks. Didn't get dizzy and didn't even feel like I was going to pass out.

I left the place without an issue, and I called my mom and dad to see how my dad was feeling. While I was dialing I took a quick sip of water. It went down a little gurgly, but not a big deal.

Got to work, and saw that the car detailers were working in the parking lot today and decided to see how much it would be to get my car cleaned up.The price was pretty fair so I decided to go back out to an atm to get cash for it.

That's when all hell broke loose.

As soon as I pulled out of the parking lot I took the last sip of my water. Not gulp, just the last sip. Instantly stuck. Watery/pukey mouth, sweaty, tears, snot, horrifying pain in my band.

I kept breathing and trying to swallow. I've been stuck 2 times before and I knew it would pass. It just needed to get through. It was just flippin water! The pain kept getting worse. I had to pull over in a gas station because I was getting to a point of not being able to drive.

I got out of the car and started walking, my whole head was leaking... like snot, eyes just streaming water. There was so much pain but it absolutely had to pass. I mean the damn meatball I got stuck on a few weeks ago took half as much time to go through, what the hell was going on??

I called MS, because why would I call the dr first? Called the dr, they said to come right back. Then I called my best friend (SH) and told her to come get me. I couldn't even get words out right. It was like there was a car laying on my chest.

She said my voice sounded so wierd that she knew something was really wrong and she ran out of the office.  She showed up and drove me back to the doctor. It was good to have her there so I could sit there and try to burp.

I slowly got better as we made the 20 minute drive, and have the comic relief of SH there made it easier to deal.

I went in the saw the doctor, she is just wonderful. I told her what happened and was adamant that I didn't want to be unfilled. She told me to drink sip water very slowly for a few minutes and then she'd come back.

Every sip gurgled and hurt going down. Shit.

She came back in and I told her, feeling pretty defeated, how bad it felt. She took out .1 ml and I was 100% better. The brick feeling went away and water went down great. Holy crap .1 ml is all it took.

I'm super tired from the ordeal but man I'm glad I went back in. That would have been a nightmare to deal with all weekend.

Even though random crap like this keeps happening, I still think the band is the best thing I've ever done for myself.

Now let's see that scale move!!

Is It Thursday Yet?

What day is it? Seriously. One of those weeks. I don't have anything too fab to write about so I'm just going to play 10 things Thursday a few hours early!

1. There is a man at work who retired from his job to come work at the company I work for. He's just a wee little guy and he doesn't do shit. He talks about himself non-stop, he plays on linked in and hotmail all day, tries to expense everything and treats all the females in the office like we're secretaries. Even though most of us hold much higher positions than he does. Some days, when he's wasting every one's time in a meeting, I fantasize about flipping the conference table over, climbing over it and throwing that little man on my knee for a whoopin. All the while screaming, "SHUUTTT UPPP SHUTTT UPPPP" Is that weird?

2. I hope you have come to understand my sense of humor by now, even though I was only partially kidding. Ha!

3. Every Wednesday the instructor that teaches bosu (not the bouncy balls instructor, the other one) Alternates between bosu and turbo kick. I like turbo kick but I decided to try a different class that starts at the same time but in the gym. It's called Sports conditioning. It was totally not fun, but it was a good work out. I really didn't like the instructor all that much. But she had us run up and down three flights of stairs 6 times. It was bananas.

4. I've noticed that in any work out whether it's yoga or whatever where I have to lay on my stomach, my port really gets sore for a couple of days. And honestly I still have quite a bit of belly fat that pads that thing, I can't imagine how it will feel 40 lbs from now.

5. My dad hurt his knee today at work. Long story but after working for a company for close to 30 years in MI, he's back to doing physical labor at 64 years old. It worries me to my core because the economy is still in bad shape up there. If you would just include him in your prayers for me I would be forever grateful.

6. Even though I haven't shown weight loss on the scale, my band is wide open. I wasn't scheduled until next week for a fill, but she's fitting me in early tomorrow morning. I went and picked up a fillet tonight to make for dinner because I do miss steak. I plan on having her SHUT IT DOWN tomorrow. So I figured a nice little piece of steak tonight would be glorious.

7. That steak was glorious.

8. Speaking of glorious. Last week I went to New York for a week for some Salesforce Admin Training. Anyone out there familiar with Salesforce? Anyways, we stayed in the financial district, which was actually a first for me. I always stay up by 102nd and Broadway when I go, so this was just a fab treat for me. My boss and I went to Fraunces Tavern which is in the oldest standing building in Manhattan. It was wonderful. We split a bottle of malbec and then proceeded to order a few more glasses after that. But the moral of my story is that we ordered a whole bunch of small stuff and split it. I actually had brussel sprouts for the first time and I could have passed out from the goodness. Since then, I have made a couple of brussel sprouts in a different way every night this week. Last night I made them with Parmesan cheese and MS tried them. Way after we were done eating he goes, "honey..... I'm not going to lie....those brussel sprouts were bangin!" Haa!

9. Tonight I made the brussel sprouts in a pan with a little splenda brown sugar and balsamic. Even though I'm not hungry, the thought of them makes me want to get up and make some more. But I'll refrain.

10. A Fill and a Haircut tomorrow! I wonder what brussel sprouts would taste like in a protein shake. ;) kidding. sick.

And with that... I leave you with my favorite inspirational quote:

If You're Struggling, Read This....

I just adore Brenda The Bandster Momma and everything she writes. Lots of ladies that I follow are struggling right now, and I think everyone should read this:

Quit Beating Yourself Up

This journey to change ourselves is not easy. No one said it would be. But we've all taken a step in the right direction and we're all here to pick eachother up.

Zumba First Timer!

Tried Zumba today on a whim and loved it. It was a really great work out! I really enjoyed it and I feel like it will make me a better dancer.

Have I ever told you guys that MS and I love ballroom dancing? I'll save that for another post!

Hibachi @ Home!

Obviously, MS and I have quite a unique set up in that we are both going through this at the same time. Everyone recommended against it, the doctors, family, everyone. I knew in my heart that was the way it was going to go, and we just went with it.

I can't even explain in words how grateful I am to have someone to go through this with. It's interesting because I think I'm tougher than MS when it comes to pain and feeling bad, and he's one thousand times tougher when it comes to sticking to the rules and playing everything by the book. So after surgery when he didn't want to get up I kept pushing to get him up and walk. On the flip side, when I slip a piece of food in my mouth after a fill, when I'm supposed to be on liquids, he always catches me. It balances out nicely.

I always wonder what it would be like if I were doing this on my own, or if we had kids to keep up with. I can't even imagine the temptations around and if I could stick to the rules as easily as I do now.

The reason I'm saying all of this is that when I make new meals, I always think if it would work for someone else who lives with non-bandsters. I love the muffin tin meals, because regular eaters can take an extra meatloaf or lasagna for a full serving. Or they can add a big salad to the side of it because, let's be real, who gets tempted by a salad?

So tonight, I made stir fry for the first time ever. I wanted to do it hibachi style so MS could make his how he wanted and I could make mine with broccoli. While I was making it I thought about how great that would be to make for a group and still control my own portions.

So this is what you need:
Protein: I did chicken tenderloins
A variety of fresh veggies: I bought, Zucchini, Mushrooms, Green Beans, Broccoli and Ginger
A variety of Asian/Thai Sauces: I did Oyster Sauce, Thai Sweet Chili, Peanut Sauce
Some other things I already had on hand were: Rice Vinegar, Chili Oil, Coconut oil, Soy Sauce, Honey, Salt, Pepper, Garlic powder

I chopped everything ahead of time, marinaded the chicken and put it in the fridge. When MS got home from golfing I just heated up the pan and coconut oil and made dinner.

For portion control we put a bowl on the food scale and zero'd it out. We just added the marinaded chicken and whatever veggies we wanted. Tossed in the sauce of choice and threw it in a very hot pan with coconut oil. It was wonderful. Everyone can have only what they like and can mix up flavors and of course everyone has as much or as little as they want!

Thumbs up!

OMG I JUST BOUGHT A REGULAR SIZED DRESS!

I just bought 3 dresses in size XL!!!!!! OMG!!!!! I walked out of the dressing room and asked the lady that worked there to do a dance with me!

Just Makes My Morning

Refocused

Woah the first week of May is over. What in the world?  Today I hit a big one.. the big Seven.Zero. Isn't that equivalent to a whole 7 or 8 year old kid? A husky one, even?

It really makes me feel good but I had an epiphany tonight. A few days before my surgery I saw a user on lapbandtalk.com that had lost 96 lbs in 6 months. I asked her what she had done and she explained that she works out for at least 45 minutes a day. She said she started walking as soon as she could and she kept working out harder and harder each time. That was when it really clicked for me and that's what inspired me to start walking right away. I set that goal to do exactly what she did.

So periodically I check up on her on lapbandtalk.com to see how much more weight she has lost. She has a newer picture and she's totally skinny. She has now lost 125 lbs and she's just a little more than a month away from her 1 year bandiversary.

Coincidentally, I am a little more than 1 month away from my 6 month bandiversary and I'm within reaching distance to the goal I set for myself right before I had surgery. It's going to take some serious discipline and I'm going to have to get back to working my ass off in the gym. But I really owe it to myself to accomplish this goal.

The past few days have been great food wise. I've really been good. I have been working out very hard, I just don't do it as much as I used to. So I'm getting up and going to the gym tomorrow for a hardcore workout.

I want to be somewhere in the -90's by my birthday which is 3 days after my 6 mo bandiversary. This is going to be tough, but it's possible. As friends, if you hear me wavering or getting whiny will you please remind me to focus on this goal? I need to do this!