Voodoo Sh*t

First let me start by saying I have the absolute funniest best friend I could ever ask for. I thank God for her crazy ass every single night. The things that so effortlessly come out of her mouth make me crack up hours, even days after she says them. She's the inspiration for the title of this blog.

We'll get back to that in a few minutes. So I wouldn't classify myself as a crazy new age, holistic nut ... but I would say that natural remedies and lifestyles to make sense to me.

Last week, my mom asked me what I knew about coconut oil. She has been on cholesterol medicine for some time and she complains that it makes her brain cloudy. I've read plenty of studies that indicate that older people need higher cholesterol for brain function, but I never really looked into it more. She mentioned her brain cloudiness to her doctor and asked him if she may be in an early stage of Alzheimer's. He told her it's the cholesterol medicine and to take two tablespoons of coconut oil in the morning.

Wait. A doctor..... told her what? You might want to start your car early this morning, Satan, because hell is experiencing unusual wintry weather.

The evening after my mom told me about this, I was logging my food in MyFitnessPal and noticed a blog on the right hand side about Coconut Oil and Apple Cider Vinegar. So I read it and researched the two for the rest of the night.

So basically what I found is that if you take 2 tablespoons of Coconut Oil every day it fuels your brain and has a specific type of fatty acid that your body doesn't break down. When your body gets that fatty acid everyday, it says to itself, "great, I'm getting what I need, so I can let go of these fat stores"

It's says exactly that. Word for word. :) hehe. What intrigued me even more was the information I read about Apple Cider Vinegar. Mixing 2 tablespoons of it with 20 oz of water and drinking it is supposed to work miracles for our bodies. It's supposed to kill bacteria and infection, calm inflammation, ease joint pain, help you lose belly fat, clears acne, plus a bazillion other great things.

The next day I told my bff about this and she said sign me up! She had told me before that she used an apple cider vinegar mix as a toner on her face and it had helped a ton. We agreed that this was some Voodoo shit. So I ran out and bought us some Organic Apple Cider Vinegar (with the mother bacteria ... the little cloudy ick at the bottom of the bottle... apparently that's the best) and some organic Coconut Oil. I had to go to two stores to find the coconut oil and I snagged the very last jar at the 2nd place... obviously some others had already gotten the memo.

So I brought my stash back to the office and we stood in the kitchen trying everything out. The apple cider vinegar is tolerable to me. I've only done 1 teaspoon in 20 oz of water and it tastes pretty good with some lemon squeezed in it. We tried the coconut oil, it didn't taste like anything but it had a chapstick consistency.  I did fine the first time, but she gagged as soon as she touched the spoon. Which in turn made me start gagging when I tried the second teaspoon.

Well, now I know that you can melt the coconut oil under hot water and add it to protein shakes, so I'll do that from now on. You can also cook with coconut oil, rub it on your skin, and use it in your hair. Pretty good for a little $5 jar.

In addition to that, I have a new found obsession with the steam room at the Y. Apparently that's another century old remedy for removing toxins from your body. It's super hot, you sweat out all the toxins and then rinse them off in a cool shower.

So I have been drinking 1 to 2 teaspoons of vinegar every day in my water for a little less than a week. I've only had the coconut oil twice. And I've used the steam room 4 or 5 times. My skin is noticeably soft and smooth and the horrible adult acne that I have been fighting for years seems to be retreating.

Less than a year ago, after trying handfuls of antibiotics for my acne, my dermatologist recommended Accutane. I told her I'd rather live with the acne than go on that garbage. Who would have thought a little $5 voodoo would do the trick.

I will report back on this in a month to let you know if this really clears up acne or if I'm just wishful thinking. I'll also check in and let you know if I notice anything else with it!